Life At Absolute Zero

When Meridian Cliffs FC play local rivals Alverton Town no one expects to find them over the moon. Sick as a parrot is their usual state of mind. But today's match is full of surprises.

Meanwhile, over in the stands, Albie is quietly coming to terms with overwhelming loss.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss reads the first of eight stories about the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a morose and wind-battered town on the South coast of England which lies, curiously, at longitude 0 degrees 0 minutes west, and also 0 degrees 0 minutes east.

Due to rampant coastal erosion, the town is literally shrinking in size. One longstanding resident is Sarah Birkett, who dreams of a small improvement in her life, involving shiny bobbins and a Daniel Craig calendar, open at August.

Written by Lynne Truss

A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss reads the first of eight stories about the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a morose and wind-battered town on the South coast of England which lies, curiously, at longitude 0 degrees 0 minutes west, and also 0 degrees 0 minutes east.

Due to rampant coastal erosion, the town is literally shrinking in size. One longstanding resident is Sarah Birkett, who dreams of a small improvement in her life, involving shiny bobbins and a Daniel Craig calendar, open at August.

Written by Lynne Truss

A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

When Meridian Cliffs FC play local rivals Alverton Town no one expects to find them over the moon. Sick as a parrot is their usual state of mind. But today's match is full of surprises.

Meanwhile, over in the stands, Albie is quietly coming to terms with overwhelming loss.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss introduces us to the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England. Founded a hundred years ago, no one famous has ever lived in Meridian Cliffs. It's only claim to fame is the Great Cliff-Drop Tragedy of 1936 when rampant coastal erosion caused a party of picnicking holiday-makers to meet an untimely end.

Thwarted ambitions, secret passions, forlorn hopes, and typically sticky British moments are all to be found in this series of beautifully observed, gently comic and often moving stories.

Today, there's a sticky moment at the drama society meeting, called to discuss the subject for the Centenary Community Play.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier Production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England. Ashley, the professional dog walker, is fond of pointing out that dogs live only in the present and that's why they're happy.

It's a skill she could use herself.

Distraught at being betrayed by her boyfriend six months ago, Ashley is firmly stuck in the past. She takes her band of Brighton pooches out onto the scrubby land behind the town - but has to marshal all her resources when Peter the Tibetan terrier goes missing.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Retired driving instructor Terry lives alone with his elderly Jack Russell, Thelonius, and his large collection of jazz records. When daytime TV's Got Any Stuff? comes to town looking for people with unwanted items to take part in the show, it provokes Terry into doing something he's been putting off. His mother died a while ago and her belongings are piled up in his garage. In among the ancient tea towels and assorted plastic ash trays, Terry finds a battered yellow suitcase whose contents take him by surprise.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Carpet fitter Jack has always been a bit obsessive about rules. So living next to a road with a 20 mph limit, which is routinely ignored by every other motorist apart from himself, is particularly testing. But when someone keeps littering the grass verge opposite his house with empty pre-mixed gin and tonic cans, one per day, it threatens to tip him over the edge.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Jim regularly phones Sarah, his first wife, to go on about Emma, his second wife. Sarah doesn't mind listening to her ex husband talking about the woman who replaced her in his life. On the contrary, she loves hearing about their marital difficulties. But when Emma finds out - what a surprise - she doesn't turn out to be quite so understanding.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Mrs Manville lives in a Tudor revival home called The Grange. Built on a double plot, it's by far the largest house in Meridian Cliffs. Now approaching 80, Mrs Manville has decided it's time to downsize.

Her son Mark, with an eye on his inheritance, has his own ideas about what she should do - but Mrs Manville clings fiercely to her independence, and chooses instead to seek the services of kind, reliable Mr Jolyon.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Mrs Manville lives in a Tudor revival home called the Grange. Built on a double plot, it's by far the largest house in Meridian Cliffs. Now approaching 80, Mrs Manville has decided it's time to downsize. Her son Mark, with an eye on his inheritance, has his own ideas about what she should do but Mrs Manville clings fiercely to her independence, and chooses instead to seek the services of kind, reliable Mr Jolyon.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, on the south coast of England.

When Hugh Velvey's carpet shop mysteriously burns down, it attracts the attention of rookie reporter, Lauren. A fan of Truman Capote and American crime reportage, she finds herself drawn to the gutted, blackened warehouse in the small, bleak wind-battered town, and dreams of writing her breakthrough piece for a British Sunday supplement.

Then a gruesome discovery is made in a Turkish rug.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs on the south coast of England. When Hugh Velvey's carpet shop mysteriously burns down, it attracts the attention of rookie reporter, Lauren.

A fan of Truman Capote and American crime reportage, she finds herself drawn to the gutted, blackened warehouse in the small, bleak, wind-battered town, and dreams of writing her breakthrough piece for a British Sunday supplement.

Then a gruesome discovery is made in a Turkish rug.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Former daytime TV celebrity Darren Fox now lives in a bungalow in Passchendale Road, where he spends his days trying to come up with new game show format starring himself. Then he gets a call from a old presenter colleague. Could this be the opportunity to reignite his career that he's been looking for?

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Former daytime TV celebrity Darren Fox now lives in a bungalow in Passchendale Road where he spends his days trying to come up with new game show format, starring himself.

Then he gets a call from a old presenter colleague. Could this be the opportunity to reignite his career that he's been looking for?

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Ravi, the proprietor of the Flag of India curry house is a football mega-fan. So when Meridian Cliffs FC's manager and his star striker take a table in the restaurant, he's over the moon. But Ravi's golden opportunity to contribute to a discussion on team tactics is interrupted by a shocking confession.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England. Ravi, the proprietor of the Flag of India curry house is a football mega-fan. So when Meridian Cliffs FC manager and his star striker take a table in the restaurant, he's over the moon.

But Ravi's golden opportunity to contribute to a discussion on team tactics is interrupted by a shocking confession.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of the fictional seaside town of Meridian Cliffs, with their thwarted dreams, repressed passion and typically sticky British moments.

Today's story tells of the widespread fall-out from the murder and arson attack at Velvey's carpets, which includes an unexpected tomato glut and a dodgy tattoo.

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss's observations on the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small fictional wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Alan Jeffreys, Chairman of the Meridian Cliffs Drama Society, chooses to ignore a series of mysterious illiterate texts, with unforeseen consequences. But it's an old fashioned letter that reminds him what he's lost.

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss's observations on the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small fictional wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Alan Jeffreys, Chairman of the Meridian Cliffs Drama Society, chooses to ignore a series of mysterious illiterate texts, with unforeseen consequences. But it's an old fashioned letter that reminds him what he's lost.

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

By night, Sarah Birkett dreams of discovering new rooms in her house. Not so surprising, perhaps, given that she's having a loft conversion done. But could the dreams be something to do with letting a new man into her life?

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

By night, Sarah Birkett dreams of discovering new rooms in her house. Not so surprising, perhaps, given that she's having a loft conversion done. But could the dreams be something to do with letting a new man into her life?

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England.

Jess, the hairdresser, keeps a map of the world on the salon wall, with pins for each client from far flung places. She loves her global network of haircuts - until someone starts tampering with the pins.

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England where divorced men from nearby Brighton come to live because property is cheaper.

One such man is Peter, a retired University don, whose well organised life is about to be disrupted by a visit from his infuriating brother.

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England where Terry finds walking his beloved dog, Thelonius, a frustrating affair.

It seems the little pooch's only goal in life is to sniff every lamp post in town and then wee on top of it. If only Terry knew what complex canine messages he was tuning into.

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll

A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England, where a white van is causing consternation among the local speed watchers.

Meanwhile, Hugh Velvey finds peace after the arson attack on his carpets business.

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll

A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England, where Colin treasures his collection of improving books.

But as lapses in his memory become more apparent, Colin's wife Shirley spots an opportunity for a bit of decluttering.

Written by Lynne Truss
Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.

Lynne Truss observes the inhabitants of Meridian Cliffs, a small wind-battered town on the south coast of England, where harmony is temporarily shattered when a long cherished belief proves false.

But the community comes together again, in this final story of the series, as everyone gathers to pay their respects to the great man of carpets.

Directed by Kate McAll
A Pier production for BBC Radio 4.