Episodes
| Series | Episode | Title | First Broadcast | Repeated | Comments |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 01 | 01 | Geoffrey Allerton | 20110421 | 20110428 (BBC7) 20130315 (BBC7) 20140718 (BBC7) 20161001 (BBC7) 20180616 (BBC7) 20220305 (BBC7) 20220312 (BBC7) 20220313 (BBC7) 20121213 (R4) | Simon Day and his characters welcome you to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of them comes to perform - with highlights of that night's show along plus all the backstage and front-of-house happenings. First on stage, it's the acclaimed Yorkshire poet, Geoffrey Allerton. Geoffrey reads poems and excerpts from his recent memoir 'Marking Time', as well as struggling to get a hot meal from sound and lighting technician, Goose. Meanwhile in the bar, two local mums are getting to know each other over several bottles of wine. Written by Simon Day. Geoffrey Allerton - Simon Day Anna / Claire - Catherine Shepherd Sarah - Arabella Weir Goose - Felix Dexter Ron Bone - Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in April 2011. Yorkshire's acclaimed poet performs at the Mallard Theatre and struggles to get a hot meal |
| 01 | 02 | Tony Beckton | 20110428 | 20110505 (BBC7) 20130322 (BBC7) 20140725 (BBC7) 20161008 (BBC7) 20180623 (BBC7) 20220312 (BBC7) | Reformed violent criminal Tony Beckton is on stage to read from his memoirs as part of his rehabilitation. Simon Day and his characters welcome you to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of them comes to perform - with highlights of that night's show along plus all the backstage and front-of-house happenings. Written by Simon Day. Tony Beckton / Peter - Simon Day Catherine - Catherine Shepherd Goose - Felix Dexter Ron Bone - Simon Greenall Stacey - Susan Harrison First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in April 2011. Reformed violent criminal Tony Beckton visits the Mallard Theatre to read from his memoirs |
| 01 | 03 | Dave Angel | 20110505 | 20110512 (BBC7) 20130329 (BBC7) 20140801 (BBC7) 20161015 (BBC7) 20180630 (BBC7) 20220319 (BBC7) 20121220 (R4) | 1990s Eco-Warrior Dave Angel performs on stage - and a confused delivery man arrives with gifts from a star. Simon Day and his characters welcome you to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of them comes to perform - with highlights of that night's show plus all the backstage and front-of-house happenings. Written by Simon Day and Felix Dexter. Dave Angel / White Van Man ..... Simon Day Catherine ..... Catherine Shepherd Goose ..... Felix Dexter Ron Bone ..... Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in May 2011. 1990s eco-warrior Dave Angel performs, and a confused delivery man arrives. |
| 01 | 04 | Billy Bleach | 20110512 | 20110519 (BBC7) 20130405 (BBC7) 20140808 (BBC7) 20161022 (BBC7) 20180707 (BBC7) 20220326 (BBC7) 20121227 (R4) | The headlining comedian is a no show at The Mallard, so newcomer Billy Bleach is asked to extend his stand-up set. Simon Day and his characters welcome you to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of them comes to perform - with highlights of that night's show plus all the backstage and front-of-house happenings. Written by Simon Day and Felix Dexter. Billy Bleach - Simon Day Catherine - Catherine Shepherd Goose - Felix Dexter Ron Bone - Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in May 2011. With no headliner at The Mallard, newcomer Billy is asked to extend his stand-up set. |
| 01 | 05 | Tommy Cockles | 20110519 | 20110526 (BBC7) 20130412 (BBC7) 20140815 (BBC7) 20161029 (BBC7) 20180714 (BBC7) 20220402 (BBC7) 20130103 (R4) | Comedy legend Tommy Cockles performs on stage, but is stunned to discover that manager Ron Bone has no idea who he is. Simon Day and his characters welcome you to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of them comes to perform - with highlights of that night's show plus all the backstage and front-of-house happenings. Written by Simon Day and Felix Dexter. Tommy Cockles - Simon Day Catherine - Catherine Shepherd Goose - Felix Dexter Ron Bone - Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in May 2011. Legendary comedian Tommy Cockles is stunned when Mallard manager Ron has no idea who he is |
| 01 | 06 LAST | Simon Day | 20110526 | 20110602 (BBC7) 20130419 (BBC7) 20140822 (BBC7) 20161112 (BBC7) 20180728 (BBC7) 20220409 (BBC7) | British comedy legend and star of The Fast Show, Down the Line and Bellamy's People, Simon Day visits The Mallard Theatre as 'himself'. Simon Day and his characters welcome you to this small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of them comes to perform - with highlights of that night's show plus all the backstage and front-of-house happenings. Written by Simon Day. Simon Day - Simon Day Catherine - Catherine Shepherd Goose - Felix Dexter Ron Bone - Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in May 2011. Will the star make it onto the Mallard stage, as himself, before the funding cuts bite? |
| 02 | 01 | Tommy Cockles | 20120531 | 20120607 (BBC7) 20131227 (BBC7) 20150411 (BBC7) 20161231 (BBC7) 20181222 (BBC7) 20220702 (BBC7) 20220709 (BBC7) 20220710 (BBC7) | Simon Day and his characters welcome you once again to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Hear highlights of the stage show, plus all the backstage and front-of-house happenings. Popular, blazered entertainer Tommy Cockles arrives to fine the theatre transformed. There's a new Nigerian owner, soundman Goose has been replaced by an authoritarian ex-copper and receptionist Catherine has disappeared off to India to find herself. Written by Simon Day. Tommy Cockles ..... Simon Day Catherine ..... Catherine Shepherd Emanuel Akinyemi ..... Felix Dexter Pat Bennet ..... Morwenna Banks Ron Bone ..... Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in May 2012. Entertainer Tommy Cockles is at the Mallard Theatre, and finds it transformed. |
| 02 | 02 | Billy Bleach | 20120607 | 20120614 (BBC7) 20140103 (BBC7) 20150418 (BBC7) 20170107 (BBC7) 20181229 (BBC7) 20220709 (BBC7) | Simon Day and his characters welcome you back to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of Simon's comic characters come to perform, while the staff struggle with rivalries, self-doubt and the new owner's vision for the theatre's future. This time, Fast Show favourite Billy Bleach returns to The Mallard, the theatre that gave him his first big break. Written by Simon Day. Billy Bleach ..... Simon Day Emanuel Akinyemi ..... Felix Dexter Pat Bennet ... Morwenna Banks Ron Bone ..... Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in June 2012. |
| 02 | 03 | Geoff Allerton | 20120614 | 20120621 (BBC7) 20140110 (BBC7) 20150425 (BBC7) 20170114 (BBC7) 20190105 (BBC7) 20220716 (BBC7) | Simon Day and his characters welcome you back to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of Simon's comic characters come to perform, while the staff struggle with rivalries, self-doubt and the new owner's vision for the theatre's future. This time, it's the turn of Yorkshire poet Geoffrey Allerton, who's accompanied by his amateur journalist friend, Duncan. Written by Simon Day. Billy Bleach ...... Simon Day Duncan ...... Paul Whitehouse Emanuel Akinyemi ...... Felix Dexter Pat Bennet ...... Morwenna Banks Ron Bone / Wozac ...... Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in June 2012. Yorkshire poet Geoff Allerton and his amateur journalist pal Duncan are at the Mallard. |
| 02 | 04 | Tony Becton | 20120621 | 20120628 (BBC7) 20140117 (BBC7) 20150502 (BBC7) 20190112 (BBC7) 20220723 (BBC7) | Simon Day and his characters welcome you back to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of Simon's comic characters come to perform, while the staff struggle with rivalries, self-doubt and the new owner's vision for the theatre's future. This time, reformed violent offender Tony Becton returns to the theatre with stories of his rehabilitation and new life in a park. Written by Simon Day. Tony Becton ...... Simon Day Emanuel Akinyemi ...... Felix Dexter Pat Bennet ...... Morwenna Banks Ron Bone / Wozak ...... Simon Greenall First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in June 2012. Reformed violent offender Tony Becton returns with stories of his rehabilitation. |
| 02 | 05 | Mick Cunningham | 20120628 | 20120705 (BBC7) 20140124 (BBC7) 20150509 (BBC7) 20170121 (BBC7) 20190119 (BBC7) 20220730 (BBC7) | Simon Day and his characters welcome you back to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of Simon's comic characters come to perform, while the staff struggle with rivalries, self-doubt and the new owner's vision for the theatre's future. This time, Australian celebrity chef, Mick Cunningham arrives labouring under the misapprehension that he'll be filming a TV show. Written by Simon Day. Mick Cunningham - . Simon Day Emanuel Akinyemi - . Felix Dexter Pat Bennet .... Morwenna Banks Ron Bone / Wozak .... Simon Greenall Rene .... Janine Duvitski First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in June 2012. Celebrity Oz chef Mick Cunningham comes to The Mallard believing he'll be filming for TV. |
| 02 | 06 LAST | Brian Pern | 20120705 | 20120712 (BBC7) 20140131 (BBC7) 20150516 (BBC7) 20170128 (BBC7) 20190126 (BBC7) 20220806 (BBC7) | Simon Day and his characters welcome you back to The Mallard, a small provincial theatre somewhere in the UK. Each week one of Simon's comic characters come to perform, while the staff struggle with rivalries, self-doubt and the new owner's vision for the theatre's future. This time, washed up rocker, Brian Pern is interviewed on stage by pretend BBC 6 Music journalist, Ben. Written by Simon Day. Additional material from Rhy Thomas and Felix Dexter. Brian Pern ..... Simon Day Emanuel Akinyemi ..... Felix Dexter Pat Bennet ... Morwenna Banks Ron Bone / Wozak ..... Simon Greenall Ben ... Rhys Thomas Original music arranged by Steve Burge. First broadcast on BBC Radio 4 in June 2012. Washed-up rocker and plumber Brian Pern comes to the Mallard and is interviewed on stage. |