Comedian, writer and actress Jackie Clune dated women for 12 years before meeting and marrying a man. She talks to those who, like her, identified as gay and then had a heterosexual relationship. This is a subject that provokes misunderstanding and downright anger and Jackie found people even walked out of her stand-up act when she mentioned her husband. We discuss how sexuality can be fluid and romance can be unexpected. Novelist Jake Arnott, who identified predominantly as gay, then fell in love with a female fellow writer, says 'You don't choose who you fall in love with.'